Man, before you get on a plane they make you take your shoes off. It's so smelly there! These are old air planes.

This is Lacey's desk at Sub Pop. Notice she is not there! Nobody ever works at Sub Pop, they just drink Sparks & get
massages and take naps and sit in the photo booth.

SEE LOOK! More Sub Pop! This is on a Monday morning! F-U-C-K-I-N-G G-H-O-S-T T-O-W-N!

Here are some chairs and things on a porch, and above in the sky: LEMON YELLOW SUN. Ok, last grunge joke.

These things are at The Anne Bonny, they are paintings. Spencer Moody runs it, he is a gallant human being. YOU CAN CLICK IT!

This is graffiti in Seattle, somebody has written "Chris Cornell" on a truck and then "only"
on the street to make it say "Chris Cornell Only". It is street art.

DEREK ERDMAN BRINGS DOUBLE HOT DOG POTS FROM CHICAGO TO MAKE PAC-NORT-WESTERNERS CHUBBY.
Ok, these hot dogs were Lacey's idea. LOOK, IT'S 7:04! WE HAVE TO BE AT THE ART SHOW AT 8PM!

First it is time to eat the hot dogs in tandem, LOOK ON THE COUNTER, NO BLEACH, NEVERMIND!
Oh, I am dumb. Not dumb - "tacocat" t-shirt.

Lacey & Ruben & me made a hot dog assembly line & made 122 hot dogs for people!
I paid for them. Nobody said thank you, so sad.

This is Ruben Mendez reading your mind. Your mind is saying, "YOU ARE LOOKING AT THIS WEBSITE AT WORK AND
YOU SHOULD GET BACK TO WORK BECAUSE YOU ARE ON THE CLOCK."

Whoa, James & Dean are in the background, east of eden! The chap in the hat said he would eat 13 hot dogs for a painting called "Drugs".
He had already eaten some, the painting was $100. Ok, Lacey's idea again, she is saying, "THIS GUY WILL BARF!"

Ok, look, he is doing it! He looks good because he is on #3. He has 47 more to go. That girl next to him is his sister and/or girlfriend!

Uh-oh, the hot dog shoveler is slowing down. THE SIGN SAYS HOT DOG TIME IS INFINITE, so he can eat more, forever.

This is Wendy & Coco & Spencer, I talked to them a lot. I was very, very, very glad to meet them. Wendy has my birthday!

Oh, no. Hot dog time is infinite but his stretchy stomach isn't. What a sad day for American Food Olympics.
OK! HE IS ON A HUNGER STRIKE, TEMPLE OF THE DOG, HE IS THE MAN IN THE BOX.

Say hello to Larry the cat. Lacey and Ruben are holding Larry hostage, it's somebody else's cat! They won't let him go home.

And then there's this one, it's called Frampton. It strangles Larry and jumps up and down on his head.
Everybody just thinks it's funny, so sad. But you know, one day, LARRY SPOKE IN CLA-ASS TODAY-AY-AY.

Here are some comedians in a record store.

Everyday I got to walk by the apartment building from Singles. Man, that shit made my day.

Everybody is bonkers for Netti Pot in Seattle. They all snort salt water and then stuff comes out of them and then they're like: LOOK!

Ruben is snorting water! Everything is drugs there! God, get it together already.

Here is Joan & Lacey at the Masonic Wedding Lodge. They are dressed up, I am wearing a potato sack. GIRLS TALKING ABOUT SHOES.

Ruben spoke to christ at the wedding! He came from blinding light and said "eat a pizza".

Here is Joan near a house boat. We went there with people but it was boring so we left.

Joan took me to Dick's! At ate the warm mayonnaisse sandwich, it was good.

After I took this picture the guy inside motioned to me that he was going to smash my head in if I took any more pictures.

You are looking at my breakfast on a $17,999 coffee table.

This Unabomber Mason Illuminati stuff is everywhere in Seattle. There is usually a girl in a smock not far behind.

"OH MY GOD, HOW CAN YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE KNOWING THAT EVERY SECOND IS TIME FOR MASONRY?" (James Masonry)

This is my going away Thai lunch. I was ready to go away at this point because I had a cold and wanted my blankets & pillows.

Here is Dinky! Dinky is saying, "Derek, these captions aren't nearly as good as the ones that you usually write!"
I'm all like, "MAN, DOG, I'M TIRED!".